Sunday, January 17, 2010

BIG question about "Living Your Dream" - HOW?

I have dreams - big and small. I am still young so I can't be bragging about being very successful but I have one thing worth sharing - I am living my dreams. I have wanted to be recognised due to desire for self-expression (which I blogged about here) and I have achieved what I wanted and more.

Desiring for recognition? I have got the Selangor Youth Award at 26 by the Ministry of Youth and Sports, Great Woman of Our Time Award at 28 by the Malaysian Women Weekly (youngest recipient so far), Lions Club District 308-B1 Distinguished Service Award and due recognition for the good deeds I have done. And I was doing all these for ONE main objective at that time - to proof to my aunt that Chew family can also be successful.

I have done my works, reached my objective after 15 long years. That made me suddenly thought "So, what's next?" My journey of self-discovery last year revolved around understanding myself better and eventually I have wanted to become a successful emcee, speaker and trainer. I wrote about my emceeing dream here.

I have quit my job beginning of the year and currently doing really good and loving my daily life because of my desire for freedom and to do what I want. I am emceeing in many events now, the recent acknowledgment was by a master in Sun Tzu Art of War saying I am the "gold medal" emcee!

I list down just a few points to share on HOW to live your dreams.

Do Good
The FIRST thing you can do to yourself and others. Doing good, keeping no regrets and living every moment at least it will be the last. Of course, I have regrets here and there but in the last few years I have lived my life without too much regrets that I couldn't sleep at night. It is interesting to note that this phrase 'DO GOOD" itself is easier said than done however we can start small by saying thank you when someone hold the lifts' door for us, smile at a stranger or just help a person who has dropped something.

Keep expenses to the lowest, commitment lowest, have substantial savings, and if you decide to be in debt - make sure can cover it in short term, a maximum of 5 years. Bad debts, to be exact!

Having my financial controlled meaning I can quit my job anytime. I work in a company knowing I am not doing it solely for money but for passion, commitment, learning and having that strong sense of responsibility. I treat the company as mine and I work as if I am the boss so that whenever I make a decision, I will always put the company as top priority - never for self-interest. So when there are people asking me why things get done - this is the main reason! If you work for money, chances are your daily work will be moaning around not enough money, no pay raise, no bonus and therefore work efficiency reduces which in turn - no raise no bonus!

This does not mean I am conservative in spending, in fact I am in the "spender" group, I would say I am not the frugal type. Ask any of my friends, they say I spend like I have millions. I enjoy "luxury" enjoyments like savouring Chinese tea, good liquor and even cigar at times! I love my gold coins collection and of course now building my property collection.

I was introduced to finance only when first reading Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. I would say it took me more than 2 years to change my mindset about money - something set in the mind by parents and guardians since young - you just gotta change it and do it! Many people do not have that guts to even start, therefore I recommend starting somewhere and now is the best time! Go attend a course or two - if it is free course, attend as many as possible! Even if it says "free previews", go attend because you will learn something.

Be True to Self
I grew up as a popular person everywhere I go. In primary school - the naughtiest! In secondary school - the loudest! I was commander for foot drill, school is so small so it will be difficult to contain your voice in that small environment. With that popularity, it was difficult to be myself. I was wearing a "mask" out everyday trying to be someone. It all stopped when I finally suffocated myself and then I said, "Let me be myself". From the day I removed my "mask" I felt great, the whole burden was lifted from me and I just be myself. There is nothing more you can give to yourself when you are yourself.

I speak directly, very straightforward, no nonsense but I appreciate sense of humor, laugh loudly and heartily! I am the most direct and straightforward person, some may be offended but I care less to think about offending who because in the end, I am responsible for myself and my mouth.

Be Contented, but not Complacency
Be contented with what you have - that's the only thing we can do daily to have what we have! I am very satisfied with my life. I have (more than) enough to eat, 2 wardrobes of clothes which I try to wear till they all tear but they could last for years! I have a good home, eventhough is rented, I have calculated the finance to justify renting. The furnitures at home enough, I have a collection of tea which could last me for at least 40 years, a good few bottles of liquor and red wine, I love making my house everyday now!

However, do have achievable goals every year and slightly challenging ones so to make your daily lives an interesting one - something that makes you jump out of bed every morning! Do not be too contented till complacency takes over.

Is not difficult to list down at least 5 things you are grateful for at the end of the night. The food you eat, the air you breath, the people who have hurt you so you grow to be a better person, things that do not get along because it helps you patience, the every little things that you have - APPRECIATE it. Say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU everyday. In fact, about a quarter ago, I started typing THANK YOU only in capital letters, even in emails. Because it is a BIG THANK YOU!

This is the single attribute that makes me jump out of bed every morning. Appreciating that I am still breathing when I wake up.

Take Chances
Quitting my job is not easy. I had about RM14,000 debts when I made the decision, I have no plans yet at that time - all I knew is I want to emcee but no jobs yet. I also want to go around to speak on organ donation but all these are for free, I also would like to be a trainer which I am now pursuing the Napoleon Hill certified trainer course (new trainer, what do you expect?) I want to invest in property but I went for 7 auctions last year only got one property so the income is not enough. But I just needed to take the chance!

I think that my bold step and courage is right because I am free. I felt that I have a "too heavy" sense of responsibility. When I am working for others, I must get things done therefore I am burdening myself when things are not done especially when decisions lies in your bosses' hands - which sometimes decisions were never made - making me madder! This heavy sense of responsibility also proven when I took the current project with Money Compass making me feel stressful when my objectives are not reached. But all good - I learnt a lot of things.

Therefore, this year I would like to take out the things that burden me - ie my job and do what I do not feel burden on - my passion. Being an emcee, speaking and training!

Is OK to Work for Free
Yes it is. In fact, this "work for free" attitude is what built me to who I am today. ALL organizations that I have joined and served are all working for free. I remember starting working for free for many people, including being the ex-secretary to Dato' Sri Ong Tee Keat. This attitude has generated more "income" than ever - even if it is not in monetary terms. It built a stronger character, learnt much more, communications skills and knowing the inside out of things.

This principle of not working for money is in line with the "financial" pointer I have above.

Once in a while or shall I say, all the time - think of GIVING! It is not just giving money. You can give more efforts to your work by doing something extra or help a colleague finishes his or her tasks. You can give your time to the old and orphaned. You can volunteer to clean your house (as in giving your family something). You can offer to cook a meal - give!

In my case, I did a super bold step to give my liver! Looking back, I have not figured out why I did that in the first place.

Play a game or two
At times we just needed to relax. Play a game or two - sports or just computer games! I was a fan of Luna Online after seeing my 50-year old mother playing CQ Online. Hey, my mom playing online games! Now, I am a fan of Farmville on facebook. Interesting how the game comes with the concept of giving and paying it forward.

Hunger to Learn
I need to relook at this and return to the always hunger to learn. I must say I have this attitude with me since schooldays making me eager to learn in many ways even trying to learn as much as I can. Now, as I grow older, I must admit there is a little "ego" in me that made me slow down a bit. As I am writing this blog, I am renewing my energy and hunger to learn.

Appreciate laughters
I laugh loudly and heartily. Some people said it was because of my ear is not functional on the left therefore I speak louder and laugh louder. True to a sense but I just appreciate good laughters. I was very serious in school. To me, being a commander for foot drill in school does not help - everything was serious, you can't laugh when in line, we were basically not just drilled on foot but drilled like any military man - therefore the tough and often rough me!

I read a self improvement book at teen age which says humor is good. I was lousiest when it comes to humor. No one at home has said good jokes - everything was so serious, my aunt was a disciplinarian. At school in class, teachers are not good jokers. How the heck am I going to learn humor. You just gotta start and since you are starting somewhere, why not NOW!? So I started to learn a few jokes and slowly blend in every conversation. Lame jokes included at first but then it improves! Do not be afraid of copying others jokes - is just for laughs anyway and laughs we should - always!

I think if you ask my friends now, I should be the one who talks a lot and laugh a lot but more to it, making people laugh the most! Agree?

So, live your dreams - is easy - you just need the first step and the first step should be TODAY. Having the slightest intention to do it is already a good start.


  1. 一沙一世界,一花一天堂,掌中握無限,剎那即永恆..................................................

  2. Really inspiring. It takes a lot of courage to do what you did, especially quitting the job. I have a lot to learn from you.